A Chosen Generation

“And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 This week wore me out. I am exhausted, but this promise I hold on to. So many times I run to sleep to find rest and to reenergize me, but coming to the conclusion that no matter how much I sleep I still remain tired. I have fallen short, I have been lacking and I have wasted so much time this week seeking in everything but the Lord. Sleep and food only gives me temporary strength. No matter how much I try to avoid the conviction that I haven’t been spending enough time with the Lord, He reveals it to me. My heart can’t live off temporary, I need the Lord everyday at every hour of my life. “My grace is sufficient for you” gives me rest in knowing that no matter how many times I mess up, I still receive a love that I don’t deserve. “My strength is made pe...

“And He led them forth by the right way, That they might go to a city for a dwelling place.” -Psalm 107:7 Whenever I cry out to the Lord, He saves me. He is always trying to lead me in the right direction, but He doesn’t force me to. It is my choice whether or not to follow Christ and it is my decision to make each and every day. In Hebrews 11 it talks about how Moses made the choice to suffer reproach instead of enjoying the pleasures of sin. He made a decision to live faithfully to Christ and I want to do the same in my walk with the Lord. I want to finish my race strong and realize what I have at the finish line, an entirety with Christ. Yes I want God working and moving in my life and amen that He has, but there are days where I don’t put in what He is trying to pour out. I let myself go a couple days run dry and tired and going into my flesh instead of seeking Him. Field time is so much different than training and it is up to me how much time I want to spend seeking ...

“So Samuel said: ‘ Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, As in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, And to heed than the fat of rams.”  1 Samuel 15:22 In this chapter Saul had been listening to the voice of people of Israel and pleasing them instead of the Lord. He was in disobedience and put sacrifice over obeying the Lord. This sin took him away from being king. It says the Lord regretted making him king. Am I putting sacrifice over obedience? At times I feel as if I’m doing things to just check off my list instead of doing them unto the Lord. I will put others needs before my own, but I need to make sure I’m doing it with the right heart and glorifying to Him and not myself. I don’t want the Lord to regret sending me here. I don’t want Him to regret using me for a purpose greater than myself. I want to make the Lord proud and excited to call me His daughter more than He already does. I want to please Him...

“Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen and called its name Ebenezer, for he said ’Til now the Lord has helped us.’” - 1 Samuel 7:12 Ebenezer- stone of help. Jesus set up my Ebenezer here in Guatemala. I needed help desperately and He knew the only way of getting me out was getting me away. Away from distractions and temptations and bringing me to a place where I could fully surrender and fully focus on Him. During training, time was put on our schedules to spend 2 hours of alone time with God. I spent more time in the Word during my training than I have my entire life. Coming back for field time we have been crazy busy and it has been our own responsibly to make time for the Lord. It’s been four months here now and God has given me freedom in areas, but I am abusing it. I will never grow if I continue to walk into each day as just another day. I will never be satisfied if I put my heart in things that aren’t of the Lord. I want that desire to spend...

“The Lord repay Your work, and a full reward be given to you by the Lord God of Israel, under whose wings you have come for refuge.” Ruth 2:12 The Lord provides a reward through every hardship we face. Not always the reward we want, but the one we need. Knowing Him more has been more than a reward for me, but a renewed/pure heart. I rest in knowing that He is with me always. I want to be kind hearted like Ruth. I want to put others needs before my own and step into the unknown. My God is sovereign and He will guide my steps when I put my life into His hands. I want to be obedient and go when God says go and speak when God says speak. I must submit to my authority here with out grumbling or complaining in my heart. I only get this season once and I want to take advantage of this time I have and fully seek the Lord and all that He has for me. I pray to be a woman of strong faith and pray the impossible prayers because I serve a God who provides the answers. My heart isn’t i...

“But when the children of Israel cried out to the Lord, the Lord raised up a deliverer for them..” Judges 3:15 I fail and fall so many times a day. My flesh wants the opposite of what God wants for me at times and I let it win, but when I cry out  to the Lord He always saves me. No matter what time of day it is or how far I have gone off. He always meets me right where I am at. His love for me is endless and there is nothing I could do that would change His love for me. And I want to be like that. I want to be able to forgive like God does. I want to love unconditionally. I don’t want to hold bitterness or anger in my heart. I want to be full of love and joy and see others the way God sees them. I don’t want to be a consumer, but a giver. The only way I will be able to grow is if I become more like Christ. There is always something new to learn about the Lord. Through His word I learn, but walking in His word is how I grow. I don’t want His word to just stay in my bra...

“but you shall hold fast to the Lord your God, as you have done to this day. For the Lord has driven out from before you great and strong nations; but as for you, no one has been able to stand against you to this day.” -Joshua 23:8-9 Coming back to Guatemala I knew it was going to be new and different, but I didn’t think the spiritual warfare would be as strong if not stronger than it was the first couple weeks of me being here during training. Wars that I have already fought through and battle the Lord has already won for me, but still having that struggle of clinging fully to Him. God has driven me out of so much anxieties, fears and temptations in my life and at this point those are the things that the enemy is trying to drive back into my life the most. I know that these next 6 months are going to be challenging, but behind each inconvenience is a hidden blessing, and that is how I must look at these hard times where I feel physically and spiritually exhausted. I must ...